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Best Self FAQs

Frequently asked questions

Why do men attend this weekend?

This weekend offers a chance to continue your personal work, honor the changes you’ve made since your initial weekend, and celebrate your best self.

Does Victories require men to subscribe to any particular set of beliefs? Does it have a religious component or affiliation?

Victories is a secular organization and has no religious component or affiliation. We welcome men of all religious, spiritual, and secular persuasions.

Who attends the Best Self Weekend?

This weekend is attended by men who have done a previous Victories weekend. We recommend doing the Best Self Weekend after completing the BreakThrough and Shadow Weekends.

What happens on the Best Self Weekend?

All activities occur in the context of a group of approximately 22-28 men, consisting of about 18 participants and 10 staff. The weekend incorporates communication exercises, journaling, role-playing, and discussions.

Is this weekend safe for Gay and Trans men?

Yes. All men are welcome on this program.

Is financial assistance and/or payment plans available to attend the weekend?

Victories does not want financial obstacles to stand in the way of a man who is ready and willing to do a weekend. We invite men to ask for the assistance they need. Financial assistance and payment plans are available. Interested participants should contact the Victories Office for more details.

Is this therapy?

No.

I am in a 12 step program. Is this weekend right for me?

Victories does not offer professional psychological or psychiatric services or addiction counseling, nor are its programs specifically designed to address the issue of addiction. This weekend is not appropriate for men who are working to manage active addiction. However, men who are in a 12 step program and/or consistently working with a therapist or counselor will find the weekend to be an additional space of compassion and support.

Who staffs the weekend?

Each leadership team is composed of two senior leaders and up to eight other staff. Everyone on the team has attended our weekend programs and received training in the group processes. Men are chosen for leadership based on their own personal growth, integrity, compassion, and commitment.

What is the weekend schedule?

We ask men to arrive by 6:30 PM on Friday. No dinner is provided that night, unless they make arrangements with us in advance. Sunday’s program concludes no later than 2:00 PM. We allow enough time in the evening for a good night’s sleep.

Are accommodations and meals included?

The Best Self Weekend is held at a camp in Illinois or Wisconsin. Sleeping and bathing accommodations are provided in heated cabins that accommodate 10 to 20 men each. There are no private rooms, and men are encouraged to bring ear plugs. Electricity is available for men who need to bring CPAP machines. Men bring their own towels and may need to bring their own bedding. Dress is very casual. Men should bring indoor and outdoor clothing and shoes. Saturday and Sunday meals and snacks are provided, and meals are taken communally. Dietary needs can be accommodated if communicated to the Victories office in advance.

Are there any rules or expectations that I should know about?

We believe that the weekend experience is enhanced when men take a break from the cares of the everyday world and focus on themselves.

  • Upon arrival, men are asked to put away their watches, cell phones, and other communication devices for the entire weekend, unless there is an emergency or health concern.
  • To keep men focused on themselves, we ask them not to talk about their jobs, politics, religion, or sports.
  • Smoking is not allowed indoors, and alcohol and other intoxicants are prohibited on the weekend
  • For the emotional and physical safety of weekend staff and participants, all items that might be considered weapons (guns, pocket knives, etc.) are not permitted on the weekend or on camp grounds.

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